We already talked about the Self Sabotage and some ways of overcoming it. To better understand and be aware of the situations when your brain is sabotaging you, we will review some of the most common mind traps.

Negative Outlook

Whenever you feel like you are fortune telling the negative outcome of an unknown situation, you are being trapped by your mind. So, whenever you hear yourself thinking:

  • I definitely won’t get this promotion
  • I will probably fail
  • This party will be a disaster

you are self sabotaging and fortune telling the outcome.

Psychic

Playing psychic is a very common trap that tricks you into predicting what other people think.
Don’t overestimate your ability to read people even if you constantly carry a crystal ball with you.

  • They will think, I’m stupid
  • They don’t smile, so they probably don’t like me
  • She doesn’t look at me, she’s probably angry

Overgeneralization

Overgeneralization is a cognitive distortion in which an individual views a single event as an invariable rule, so that, for example, failure at accomplishing one task will predict an endless pattern of defeat in all tasks.

  • Assuming the worst
  • Thinking one mistake indicates all future attempts will result in failure
  • Negative self-talk
  • Thinking you can never do anything right
  • Using language like “never,” “always,” “everybody,” or “nobody” to describe events or behaviors
  • Viewing one-time events as consistent patterns

Self-limiting overgeneralization happens when your negative thought patterns prevent you from meeting your own potential.

Labelling

If you use judgemental words to describe yourself or other people you can get caught in labelling. Some examples of it are the following:

  • I’m useless
  • She’s hopeless
  • They’re stupid

Tools to overcome mind traps

Fortunately most mind traps are correctable with a bit of practice. Some of the practices for overcoming the cognitive distortions are the following:

Reframe

Reframe your thinking to view the situation differently. So, instead of thinking I can't do anything right better reframe it as I messed up, but it happens to everyone.

Or an even constructive thought could be: I messed up, but I know how to prepare myself better next time.

Prove yourself wrong

Your actions impact your feelings. What can you do to combat negative thoughts?

For instance, if you think you’re not smart enough because you don’t understand stock markets, you can learn more of something you understand and enjoy, like software engineering.

If you feel like no one cares about you, talk to a friend and that will give you evidence that these thoughts aren’t entirely true.

Counter negative thoughts with positive ones

Whenever you catch your inner dialogue that’s mean towards you, make yourself say something nice. It will balance it out.

Name things you love or like about yourself. Practicing gratitude will also help when you struggle with negative thoughts.

Thoughts aren’t facts

Your thoughts and feelings are valid but they don’t always represent reality. If you feel ugly it doesn’t matter that you are ugly.

More often than not, we can be our worst enemies, whereas other people see us in a much nicer light.